Posted in LIFE, Love


Today, every last thought of you seems as delicate as touch
For within this masquerade, time goes from days to months
Assured herein lies, all I could ever need or want
Words of a proud prisoner to your angelic magic wand
Attached to the ways time and space, built this bond
Fully aware this may become unhealthy, before too long
Revelations of what it feels like when it’s all gone
Anxiety similar to an escapee on the run
Left over agitation from vacationing in both hell and heaven
Never the same since the union conceded and ended
Lost without an angel’s heart to defend
Left morning a love but also a friend
Conscious of the fact, I’ll never be that guy again,
The guy who gets to be your number one fan
Instead a student to the lesson; not everything is meant for us to understand.
Unable to grasp how to take proper advantage of a chance,
The shy guy still too afraid to ask for a dance,
Dejected, forced to only admire from a safe distance;
A circumstance looked upon with utter disdain,
As if all that could be, has already been flushed down the drain,
My own amoeba, feasting off these thoughts on my brain.
Faced with guilt, associated with the placement of blame
Amazed still how yesterday’s joy can become tomorrow’s pain;
Difference between winning and losing the campaign,
Crowned the loser obligated to run and hide in shame,
Asking yourself every day since, are you insane;
To let her walk away like we were just playing a game
Addicted to the misery now like its cocaine,
In need of assistance; forced to walk with a cane;
Admitting without, every day it gets harder just to maintain
Surviving the fall from the peak of desire’s mountain
Still hostage to the moment all was lost in an instance
The exact moment, passions, moved past their infancy
Words which express, what I’d do different
Compelled to stop everything, just to carry on playing pretend
An illusion disguised before us as a pretense.
Hidden from what was preserved within these pledges of prestige,
All a byproduct of a heart and mind, unable to agree
Engaged in a heated debate over merits deemed today, as unreal
Witness to a true ‘fool’s paradise’; both the taste and feel.
People conveniently absent, as blood begins to be spilled,
An angel’s face, unable to assure sanity, to an ill mind;
Questions of how I could ever let myself see you as just mine;
Stuck on rewind, to find when that line was crossed,
Taking all that was, into darkness, from light
Repercussion of falling again, to yet another pattern of life
Ill-advised belief, this was anything more than an elaborate lie.
For if beauty is truly within the beholders eye,
Then it’s obviously, obvious; I’ve started to go blind.


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